Are you coy as a kitten or the queen of kink? Take this quiz to discover what your favorite wine says about your sexual style.

Posted by on Friday, March 26, 2010    Print This Post Print This Post

1.) Your ideal wine tends to be…

full-bodied and textured, like a showstopping Malbec—and with a long finish (if you know what I mean).
spritzy, pleasant and noncommittal, like a Vinho Verde—something that works morning, noon or night.
something cerebral, understated, and that not everyone “gets”—like a Musigny Red Burgundy.

2.) Favorite bouquet?

Upbeat and citrusy.
Earthy. Grass and tar are music to your nose.
A floral whisper.

3.) This wine is the best you’ve had all week. How do you express your appreciation?

A content smile and closed eyes.
A few enthusiastic words before moving on to the next thing.
Oooohs and ahhhhhs galore.

4.) Red, white, bubbly, rosé—how often do you, ahem, switch preferences?

All the time, baby! Variety is the spice of life.
You have your favorite, and pursue it with a singleminded passion.
You like to get to know each type of wine slowly and gradually.

5.) How important is stemware?

Who cares? Glass, plastic or crystal: You really can’t taste the difference.
Important. You love the feeling of cupping a chalice in your palm.
Somewhat important, but only when there’s sentimental value attached—like if it’s a gift or an heirloom.

6.) Your hottest daydreams involve:

The love of your life, the one that got away or your favorite brooding actor.
The love of your life, the one that got away and your favorite brooding actor.
Winning that prize they’re always giving out in Sweden.

7.) Oh yeah, you gotta eat something with that bottle. Your ideal food pairing?

Your usual comfort food.
Something fast and light and that doesn’t get in the way of your wine.
Something meaty and juicy, a big culinary experience to go with your big, bold glass.

8.) How often do you take the sommelier’s advice?

Rarely. Most likely, you’ve been doing this longer than he has—maybe he can learn a few things from me!
All the time. You love to learn new oenological tricks from the pros.
Often. In fact, You sometimes let myself get intimidated into ordering a wine you don’t like.

9.) Your favorite après-sex drink?

A grown-up, tawny port—a gourmet finale to a four-course tryst.
Ice water!
A sweet and adorable dessert wine, like a sauterne.

10.) First date outfit?

Sky-high heels and a black dress that leaves something to the imagination, but with racy lingerie underneath.
Flashy, low-cut top and figure-hugging jeans. The more skin, the better.
Let’s just say: Laura Ingalls Wilder would have approved.

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Comments

3 Responses to “Are you coy as a kitten or the queen of kink? Take this quiz to discover what your favorite wine says about your sexual style.”
  1. valentinemartin says:
    March 26, 2010 at 12:35 pm

    An interesting result and a nice glimpse at my taste in wines, something I never thought about.

    Reply
  2. Freda Mooncotch says:
    March 26, 2010 at 2:46 pm

    Glad you liked it! Fun eh!

    Reply

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  1. Wine Quizzes & Other Wenchery — The Wine Wench Shoppe | The Wine Wench Shoppe says:
    March 31, 2010 at 10:14 am

    [...] -Are you coy as a kitten or the queen of kink? Take this quiz to discover what your favorite wine say… [...]

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